“I have been both a victim of sexual abuse and most recently, rape.” Read Maureen Alikor’s Story and Her Campaign on Demystifying Abuse.

Photo: Maureen Alikor

On the 16th of November 2016, my door was forced open by armed robbers who immediately striped us of all our devices and valuables. Myself and a friend. With a gun to our head, we were commanded to strip. We did.

Yes, we were raped at gun point.

All our pleas fell on deaf ears as they had their way, and left.

Few minutes later, mobile policemen and neighbors began to converge in their neighborly pattern; in twos and threes, with folded arms, solemn looks, bowed heads and pitiful eyes; with much “sorry” and “take heart” to give, and curses intended to follow the rapists/armed robbers. But soon they left in their trickles.

Fast forward to the next morning, neighbors and sympathizers converged yet again, and started dishing out various kinds of words of encouragement and advice on what to do; ranging from taking my pants to prayer altars so as to lay curses on the culprits, to burying the panties thereby burying their destinies. Others said, to do this and do that. And of course, go to the hospital for check up against pregnancy, HIV and infection.

I listened intently, but a part of me desperately wanted to hear them make mention of the emotional and psychological counselling that a rape victim should undergo. But they were most concerned about the shame associated with the rape and with the properties stolen.

I knew better, but I wanted to find out if our society is changing and becoming abreast with the changing times. I was disappointed.

The most disturbing part of the kind of advice coming my way was the part I had heard frequently; which is the part of not talking about it and not letting more third parties hear about it.

Within me, I boiled angrily at the shocking truth of insensitivity and gruesome backwardness that still held our sense of reasoning. We attach so much importance to the vagina, yet make rape and abuse victims shrink in fear and self-loathing just because they were raped.

We make it shameful for victims who in their innocence were forced against their will and consent, while the rapists’ glory in their act when we choose to say nothing. Just because we choose to cajole victims to be quiet and hide, for in our words, they have been raped or sexually abused thus shame should be their cloak and clothes. Meanwhile, the shame ought to belong to the rapists and abusers.

My name is Maureen Alikor. I have been both a victim of sexual abuse and most recently, rape. One of which was by a relative and the latter, an armed robber. On this premise and knowing the importance of speaking out, I am launching a campaign called DEMYSTIFY ABUSE.

It is a neighborhood, school to school, and house to house campaign aimed at helping abuse and rape victims go through the experience knowing that their worth and self-esteem is not tied to their vagina. 

It is also to help rescue those who may have fallen into the pit of self-pity and self-loathing; hating themselves and not seeing anything good and meaningful coming out of their lives. The campaign is aimed at demystifying abuse of every kind, of which rape and every rape-related activity is family to.

-Maureen Alikor

You can find all the details with regards to Maureen Alikor’s campaign and how you can be part of it here.

Note: Maureen Alikor’s submission has been very lightly edited; mainly glaring typos, in an attempt to not stray from her original voice.