Sista Clinik

I chanced on a WhatsApp status where a young woman was giving herself accolades and it somehow ended in her expressing joy and pride at being ‘someone’s future wife’. I use ‘joy’ here, for lack of a better word. However, it was more along the lines of her seeing being a wife as the ultimate prize for her womanhood.   Now, this is not an isolated case; it would be much easier if it were. Then it could be related to personal aspirations and goals. Of course, each one of us is different and we have different hopes and wants and desires. However, this happens way too many times to be attributed to personal wishes alone. I have seen a lot of women express this need to achieve the ultimate; to get to the climax of womanhood. Unfortunately, this climax of womanhood, to many, is being a wife. It is never anything else.    This begs the question; why? Of all the things a woman can aspire to be, why is it always ‘a wife’?  Again, to be clear, it is not wrong for one to as...

Depression is not a ‘white people’ thing. I have been experiencing chronic depression for a while now, and I am black! I am a black woman.  It is also not an ‘old people’ thing. I am in my 20s. And I’ve lived with it since forever! I’ve become used to it for so long I almost don’t know what it feels like not to be depressed.  I’ve been depressed as a teenager. More than once the thought of suicide crossed my mind. The most vivid one, I cut my arms multiple times and watched as the blood trickled down. My mind is creepy most of the time. My bouts of misery is frequent. I have more memories of sadness than happiness. Waking up is hell. All I want to do most of the time is to sleep. Reality sucks. It is full of pain. It is filled with hopelessness. It is dejection. Loneliness.   Complete desperateness.  Where did this come from? When did it start? How did I get here? I was never a happy kid. I vividly remember I’ve hated myself since I was 13....