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Women, Marriage, Child Birth and The Blackmailing Older Generation in Ghana

S ome years back, in my late teens, I always told myself I’d get married before I was 23. The thought of being able to enjoy life with my companion in holy matrimony without being pressed (physically, psychologically, or biologically) for children was ideal. I wanted to travel the world. Know people. See places. For my partner and I to get our act together before creating and bringing life into this world.   Maybe the motivation came from knowing my parents discovered each other and started life together quite early. My mother had me when she was barely 21. Three kids down the line, my dad is now in his late 40s, with my mom, a little behind. Definitely, the ‘young old couple’ thingy is attractive. But. I’m currently in my mid-20s. And unmarried. So many things replaced the desire for me to tie the knot before 23. I realized, somehow, that there was no rush. My priorities had shifted. There was education, a lot of growing up to do, and basically life! And there was also ...

"Stop the Car or I'll Jump": A woman's ordeal on the Accra-Tema Motorway

In my early 20’s, a friend shared a story with me about this old Lebanese man who gave her a lift on the Accra-Tema motorway roundabout on a rainy day. She was working in Accra and needed the lift to make i t on time so she accepted. “ When we got to Trasacco junction, he started running his fingers on my thigh. I pushed his hand away, but he just laughed and said, you see the rain ? He took my hand again and put it on his thigh, just about an inch from his crotch. I tried pulling my hand away, but he said again, you see this rain? Then he said if I didn’t keep my hand there, he would drop me in the rain” She narrated. So she kept her hand on his crotch, rubbing it till she got to the end of the motorway where a car from her office was waiting to pick her up. About 2 weeks after she shared her nasty experience with me, I was also on my way home from the cafĂ© at around 10:00pm when a man offered me a lift. He obviously wasn’t Ghanaian, from his appearance, and looking a...

Why must this be the first sentence uttered by men when you get pregnant?

“A woman can endure all; every pain, every hurt, every bruise, but not one that she causes herself.”   I have decided to share this not because I want to tell my story, but because I want to heal even though that seems like too much to ask right now. I am not in the position to make demands. It is my only hope that someday, maybe, I will be able to forgive myself and move past this. A woman never understands motherhood until she becomes one , or shall I rephrase; a woman never understands motherhood until she experiences what it takes and means to be a mother. It isn’t just about bringing a child into this world; it is about bringing yourself into this world. You are tied by the breath of life to the child you bring forth.  The joys of a mother are that; like the cactus plant she has faced death and triumphed with life and for as long as she lives she will never experience anything as encouraging and comforting as her child’s first clutch of her thumb. It...