Sista Clinik

National service started on a good note, until some of the men in my office started to misbehave towards my fellow female service personnel and I. It started with sexual jokes which we were all not comfortable with. Then it moved on to gifts, money and promises to buy us stuff all in the quest to touch our bodies. There was one particular man who would go round each morning to greet everyone. He used that opportunity to rub his hands on our backs till he felt our bra through our dresses. I ignored it the first time thinking it was just my imagination. He did it again the next day and I began to feel uncomfortable. The third time he tried it, I gave him a bold and polite warning that I wasn't comfortable with that. His response? He shouted at me and asked me which sort of person I was and rained a few insults on me. I ignored him and reported the issue to my boss to talk to him on my behalf. Fortunately for me, my boss is one of the few upright men in the office. He did talk to...

Vera’s story on sexual harassment shared last Friday reminds me of mine . I recently changed jobs, and I quite remember the question my then employer asked when I broke the news of my resignation. Apparently he had heard from somewhere that his P.A was being harassed, sexually, by a man also in the office.   ‘ Are you leaving because of Kofi (real name withheld)?” he asked. “ I heard he’s been harassing you. Is it true ?” Well, no I wasn’t leaving because of Kofi; not necessarily. But Kofi wasn’t making my stay at the company easy either. I remember also vividly the very day I took the job. I was seated next to the lady who was handing over to me. There were a few things she needed to take me through before she took her big step out of the company.  As we sat behind the desk, this man that I later got to know as Kofi walked by. He went straight to the Augusta (also real name withheld), and while talking to her, helped himself to what was almost a scoop o...

Today’s post is more of a discussion. We want you to share your thoughts on this one—especially the men.   I was with a guy I had developed strong feelings for. The ‘relationship’ was young, and we were that crazy about each other. I was pretty sure we were in deep, but being the listener that I was, a couple of his passing comments would strike me deep. He never failed to let me know he was in for the ride, without commitments, whatsoever. I thought perhaps I wasn’t showing him enough love. So I multiplied the attention I gave him, showered him twice as much love, all in hope that he would see me as part of his future. A couple of men speak about how they are with women they do not like simply because they are an easy catch, or are always there when they need to satisfy sexual urges.  Some of them have even gone to the extent of announcing their intention to these women; that they will never marry them, and it doesn’t go beyond the sex. So what exac...

I walk into the shower of the hotel with Adele's new album playing in the background. The water is comforting, but why am I here when I'd just stood under another shower nozzle at my friend's house 3 hours ago? What is it that needs to be scrubbed off this time around? What dirt could I have possibly accumulated in such a short space of time?   Maybe it is the hopeless cries of heartbreak I have had to endure over the past three days. This was my duty as the best friend; to comfort and bring solace to my grieving friend for her ended relationship of almost 3 years. I had never seen my friend like that, and I was there when she buried her father. My awkward self involuntarily went into shut down mode, clueless on how to help steer her back to being the jovial friend I enjoy. Was it the messy room, the unwashed dishes or the unmade bed I slept on all day? Where do I need the water to reach this time? Her boyfriend finally called and I am hopeful th...