During
weekdays, after school, when the older people were not home yet, the bigger
children among us; mostly teenagers, would convene in one apartment to watch
‘blue film’. We, the younger ones, would be spread out as messengers—to sound
the alarm when any of the parents came home.
As
time went on, our curiosity grew until Melinda and I decided to partake in the
older children’s dine. That day, we crawled bare footed on the balcony floor
right behind the sitting room to take a peep through the slightly opened
curtain.
They
were all so quiet and focused as if taking a math lesson. There was a naked man
lying in a canoe, and a naked woman sitting beside him. And they were just
staring at each other. We got bored a few seconds after and crawled away. I was
then 9, and Melinda, 6.
Three
years on, I witnessed my dad cheat on and abuse my mom. They would lock us up
in a room and fight so loudly my sisters and I would end up crying. I became an
angry kid, and developed a hatred towards boys, and an unusual closeness to
girls…in this case Melinda.
One
day, we decided to act out some scenes in a famous telenovela which we watched
every night with the older kids. I dressed up like a guy and found some bras
which I stuffed with handkerchiefs for Melinda. After dressing up, I would
touch her, and undress her in bits till only her panties and stuffed bras
remained. Then I would put my lips on hers. She would then throw her head back,
like in some kind of pleasure.
This
went on for a couple of weeks, until we stopped abruptly. I don’t remember how
or what caused us to stop. Neither do I remember us getting caught. Over the
years, I got a little confused over my sexuality. I thought of Mel, perhaps I
preferred being with a woman?
I
didn’t really know what to think, until some years back, a woman asked me out.
I was utterly disgusted. So I guess what happened with Melinda was just an
innocent experiment?
Jane,
Ghana
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